Beclabito Memories and Discomfort

Tonight there will be a dinner in Farmington in my honor. It's nice that some would want to do this...but there is an overlapping feeling of politics. Dinner-Great idea! Politics-Get me out of here! I know enough about the people involved to take it all in stride.

My classroom feels empty...maybe like a prom after all of the decorations have been taken down. There is plenty I'll miss. There are some things I won't miss. I explore these thoughts in expectation of some speech on my part tonight.

I will miss the students. The kids who came to visit me with drawings and writing. The writing club I'd started was popular with many of the students. I enjoyed having morning duty and overseeing running races "...around the tree, around the basketball court, around the slide, back to me and slap my hand". I liked the time I had with the 4th grade as a sub and also the time I was able to teach some of the 2nd graders reading.

My adult students were a trip! The day started and ended according to their schedule. I tried not to get discouraged. I always had a plan and coffee brewing in the morning. I find teaching one or two students so much more difficult than a classroom full (in fact I'll take 70 students over two any day!).

My opinion towards wanting a full classroom seemed to conflict with others' opinions. To me, few students is way more work and dull than many students. I had way too many days with only one or two students. To say I was underwhelmed and bored would be an understatement.

I will miss the wildlife. The rabbit and lizard population at the school is healthy. In the warm months, I felt I was constantly chasing lizards out the door. There aren't too many rez dogs around Beclabito. Some days I'd see one or two. I did, on a couple of walks to the highways, watch a pack of 6 or 8 dogs chasing something (probably a rabbit).

Phone calls at Beclabito were always interesting. If I had a call, the cooks in the kitchen would yell for me. If my door was closed, they might walk down the hall and open to yell in. usually by the time I got to the phone the caller would have hung up. If I still had someone on the line, I usually had to speak very loud (not yell) over the cooking, dish washing, or country western music (the ladies always picked a local station to listen to).

The old building my classroom was in had been build some 75 years ago. There were old pipes and other less desirable things to deal with (such as the possibility of asbestos or other toxins in the air). the classroom itself had been a library, a dorm and a multi grade classroom prior to Adult Education moving in.

One thing I was able to add to the Beclabito adult education class that I think will, stick is puzzle building. I guess it is a minor addition, but proof that I made some difference. I enjoyed the conversations and visiting with students that happened while we put them together.

The biggest thing I will not miss from this setting is taking on the role of coordinator. Wow, did that ever suck! Try taking on double the duties without buy-in from your coworkers. Add to this no extra pay (although other sites do pay their coordinators). I absolutely hated it! Lordy, don't ever put me in charge of something without some backing! Ouch!!! Still, I guess what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. I guess I'm nearly Sampson in my inner strength!

I do believe we are all on a journey. To me God is a busdriver. My journey has lead me to Belcabito and is now without a doubt leading me away. Sometimes I'm slow on understanding why things go the way they do. I suspect given a little time all of this will make complete sense.

I appreciate the time with kids, adults, and staff. I hope to have continued contact to the school. As the new building goes up, I hope to hear the numbers, hopes and strengths of students soars.

Snails and Other Stuff

It has been a landmark weekend for the Keleher clan. My nephew Finian evidently broke the world record for "snails on the face". There were three news camera crews overseeing the event. Of course, I think it is cool...but the posted comments were less impressed.

As for myself, I have three more days at work in Beclabito. I'm sad to be leaving the good kids. I'm glad to be moving onto new pastures. I wonder what I'll be doing for income in the near future.

The box pile is building in my garage. I will with the help of friends haul all of my stuff to Farmington and load it on a semi trailer. I'm nearly ready...just hope the heat doesn't get too crazy.

My writing and reading are suffering right now. I suspect I'll get back into the groove after I settle in my house. In the meantime, I will probably take a break and do some sort of travel.

Box That Please!

There's this new found energy in my life. It feels like things are starting to work at the proper pace. Things are happening!

I'm planning to make my big move across the US at the end of next month. I have little planned beyond that. I suppose a major move and finishing out my school year is plenty.

I've been going through closets and shelves bagging and boxing what I want to take...and keeping the stuff I don't want aside for a thrift store drop-off. It feels great! It really does.

Life on the reservation, in a different culture, by myself, and among the occasional sand storm is tiring along with dull (at this point). I'm ready for coffee shop mornings, drizzly days, house projects and (dare I say) the possibility of a dating scene. I'm also hopeful of getting my foot in the door at the local school. Maybe there's a writing group. Maybe there will be hikes with friends. Maybe I can going out in the canoe to meditate/fish. Maybe I can have cookouts. Maybe I can visit NYC for a weekend (it's 5 hours away). Maybe I can create a perfect Hobbit hole to live out my life (though an adventure now and then wouldn't be passed up!). Too many maybes...too much excitement.

I'm also looking forward to green...and all of the fresh smells that come along with the color. The woods, trails, and wildlife. I know it'll be good for me. I might even take up painting again (my truest passion...although some mistakenly think it is writing).

Change is good. Change is inevitable. I'm ready to take the plunge!

Coffee, Groceries, Writing--Proof I lead a Dull Life

I have a few plans for the weekend. No Easter egg hunts. No ham dinners. Just coffee tasting, grocery shopping, and writing.

There's a plant place at the end of Montezuma Avenue. It has some nice stuff. The coffee is good. I like what's in the store, but find the location odd (next to a trailer court and not on the main strip). The couple who own it seem nice and hip. My favorite thing about the place is, I think, the old truck they use to advertise. Anyhow, the coffee and some music will be free tomorrow...so I'll go there for my Saturday morning fix.

Grocery shopping...what can I say? I don't really like it. I cook only for myself and find I buy pretty much the same thing every week. It bores the crap out of me! I'd like to get excited about cooking. I guess with a change in social settings, I may find myself entertaining others (it's a better motivator towards good food). My biggest thing not to forget when shopping is potable water (nobody seems to trust the water at Teec).

I've got the first dozen pages of a new novel underway. It's not quite right yet. I'll hold off on sharing until I feel better about it. It may take awhile. I also need to get back to the library and do some hunting for publishers. I sent off a query letter to four publishers. I've gotten two back--one saying they are not accepting anything right now... the other just had a return to sender sticker on front. Anyhow, my instructor Kevin McColley suggest I keep a line of possible publishers in mind. Who'd thought writing would be so much work?

Knowledge- A Terrible Thing to Share?

I had an interesting weekend. As Dr. Shelton considered my thoughts on Morgellons worth sharing with other doctors, I thought why not post it on a site for people suffering. I did. Was it a mistake? I don't think so.

I had a number of members show confidence in detoxing. Some voiced that they were glad I shared. I also went to a strand (is that what it's called?) and added my opinion on bloating being related to mercury in your system. I got some major misguided anger. I guess I'd been passing some myself (like to the medical researchers working on Morgellons). Somehow it'll all sort itself out.

Work has been really slow! I had two students today. I think I'll be more comfortable when I get into a more predictable classroom setting. I guess I'll find out soon enough!

My writing has been moving slowly ahead. I guess when I don't have distractions, I make the best progress. The past couple of weeks have been stressful with the winds, work tensions, and possibly the new celation I've been following (it makes me tired...and, yet, I can't fall asleep?!). Anyhow, this too shall pass.

I am beginning to shift. I have started packing books. I will be selling my motorcycle. I hope to soon know where my new home will be. It could be it'll even surprise me? I'll keep you posted.

Winds Be Gone!

The winds are picking up. It's springtime in the Four Corners! Initially, the winds aren't so painful. After a month of them and their effect on sleep (sometimes I feel like I'm on board a ship in a monsoon), you want nothing but peace.

The week has been busy. I did make the journey back from my visit to Phoenix. Dr. Shelton got me rolling on a new detox protocol (costly,but designed by "The Master" as he put it). I had my IV celation while at his office (leaves my urine smells metallic for two weeks). I promised to send him my thoughts on Morgellons via email.

I kept to my promise and wrote out a list of observations and speculations on Wednesday. He was impressed enough to request posting my thoughts on a statewide website for medical professionals in Arizona. Whatever it takes to get the word out on this condition is worth pursuing.

Yesterday was a productive day for my writing. I sent off two query letters and started drafting a new book (romance with a twist). I guess if I keep writing and knocking on doors one will eventually open.

It is eight weeks until the end of the school year. Eager to head in new directions, I got boxes yesterday from the supermarket to begin packing. I hope the direction I'll be taking will become clear soon!

What's Up?!

I'm in Scottsdale, AZ. It's a strange feeling. I'm staying at the old resort turned apartment complex- The SunKing. It is amazing just how not much of anything has changed. Anyhow, I made the half hour hike up to the library to email and thought I had time to write in the blog- I do...and here it is.

I've not written a new post since my return from San Diego. In a nutshell, I got incredibly sick and ended up in the Cortez emergency room. I drove the whole 45 mile drive late at night, gasping for air, and unable to think straight. My heart was going at an unbelievable rate. As with my other 4 emergency room visits over the past 5 years...I was told nothing was wrong. I guess it's good to hear. I somehow suspect it relates to shifts in the wind from the power plants (raising the levels of toxins in the air)...but it'd be impossible to prove.

Anyhow, all of this prompted me to visit Dr. Shelton (one of the world's best known detox specialist)...which is why I'm here. His office is in Phoenix and I have a Monday morning appointment. As the costs are high (my last visit was around $650.00) and my insurance covers nothing (he is a homeopathic), I plan to get the best out of what I plan to be my final visit. I hope to get more information on continuing to get the heavy metals out of my system on my own.

In the realm of strange coincidences, my old girlfriend emailed me today (we haven't made contact in some time). She tells me she is considering some self hypnosis work...unknown to her I purchased a self hypnosis CD last night. Cosmic, eh?